Discovering Perspective

I just found this game. Looks like it is still under development but you can download the prototype. I'm very excited. Way cool. Must play.

Went bowling with some friends last week.

Game 1 score - 7
Game 2 score - 101

That's right. 7. Seven. And I was trying.

For everyone who has been awaiting the news almost as anxiously as me...

I heard from Harvard last week. Unfortunately, it looks like it's not in the cards for next year. I was a bit disappointed but I knew it was going to be a tough competition. Four spots isn't a lot. I'm happy to have some more time to look into the other school and put out more applications next year.

Thanks for your well wishes and support. I'll hold onto them for next year.

... you always know what to say.


(For clarification, read my last post.)

I'm such an anti-anti-feminist feminist.

Though I kind of object to the term feminist.

I would go for humanist if it weren't already taken.

And so laden with other implications.

Maybe selfist.

---------------------------

I was just chatting with Mekki about the fad/campaign/push during my high school years (probably a bit before and still present) to "encourage" girls into the sciences. Being a girl who was good at science (well, top-of-the-class-good, to be specific), I got a lot of this kind of "encouragement". Many a parent-teacher meetings went something along the lines of: "What can I say about Sarah? She is very talented. You should encourage her to stick with science. It is rare to see a girl succeed in science and stick with it."

I think the mistake was the assumption that I chose not to pursue science because I was afraid it was un-cool or not the place for a woman. They failed to realize the amount of pressure, not peer pressure but superior/elder/adviser pressure, being put on girls to prove girls can do it too. Luckily, I didn't care either way. They were missing the point that feminism had succeeded to the point that, at least in my family, school, neighbourhood, etc., it wasn't even part of my decision making process.

I enjoyed art.

I enjoyed math.

Decision made.

Courses chosen.

I didn't chose classes because I was girl or to prove a girl could do it too. In the same term I took Design and Technology (shop) where I was the only girl, and Art where everyone but one student were girls.

In a recent conversation, I mentioned that I stopped taking science (except physics because it is actually math) in grade 10. The response was "Ah, you're one of them. Dropped science to boost your grades." Actually, in all likelihood, science would have probably raised my grades. Anyone who knows my graduating average might not believe it, but it's probably true.

Ironically enough, I still pick a profession that also "suffers" from being "under-represented" (as if there is a right amount of representation) by women.

"You go girl!"

*gag*

And now I choose to be among the majority of female architecture students who don't go on to become architects. Actually, that's phrased poorly. I am choosing to not go on to become an architect, which puts me among the majority of female architecture students. There is some debate if that is true. If the numbers are skewed by only counting licensed architects as architects. There are a lot of women practicing architecture, in some form or another, that aren't "architects". But we'll talk Linda Nochlin another time.

The point being...

I know a lot of girls who went on to study one science or another at university. Many of them did very well. Maybe it is just personal experience or my own perception, but I don't know many of them who are passionate about their career or field of (supposed) interest.

I know some...

Who "like" it.

Who do "well" in it.

Who are "successful" with it.

I don't know many...

Who "love" it.

Who want to be the best (or at least the best they can be) in it.

Who are driven by it.

I can't help but wonder if they would have been more fulfilled, both as women and, more importantly, as their selves, had they not been pressured, consciously or otherwise, into following a path whose goal was to balance the sheet not to make people necessarily more fulfilled.

There is the theory that women are more likely to find fulfillment in their personal lives and therefore don't search it out in their professional lives. I have no problem with that. I like to see that people are happy with their lives. That's my big criteria. A lot of the time I know I wouldn't be happy or happy enough with their life. But I don't need to be. It's not my life to be happy with. I hate seeing wasted potential. Not wasted potential as in "she could have been a great scientist" but potential as in "she could have been happier as a carpenter (for example)."

I like seeing people being passionate. My preference is, or rather, I relate best to it in one's career or profession but I'm generally just happy to see it in any aspect of one's life.

And I don't see it nearly enough.